Not funny conversation

Ray: Mom, is dad's cologne posionous?

Me: Only if you swallow it. Why???!!

Ray: I did swallow it! I sprayed it in my mouth!

Me: What? Why??

Ray: I saw it on a cartoon (Tom and Jerry) to make your breath smell good!!


I won't give you all the details about the discussion that followed, but in the end he drank a lot of water and felt okay. He also promised not to do anything he sees on cartoons if he's never seen anyone do it before in real life.

This was a somewhat minor incident but it made me pause and reflect on how it could have been worse. A relative lost her little daughter years ago because she was trying to do what she saw on a cartoon. It makes me realize that my children absolutely ARE being influenced by what they see and hear. Since I can't lock them in their rooms until they're grown, I guess for now I will have to rely on prayer and even more hands on parenting.

....so much responsibility.....one little mother

Funny Conversations

At the store yesterday I threw a box of unmentionables into the cart.

Ruby: Mom, what are those?

Ray: Ruby, those are called coupons. Right mom?

Me: (Hesitating...) Yes.
_____________________

Ruby: Hey Elijah (her 4 yr old cousin), when we get to my house, do you want to do homework?

Elijah: Homework?? Cool!!

Ruby: Yeah! Mom can we do homework when we get home?

Me: Of course! (Thinking how sweet little 4 year olds are!)
____________________

Ray: Mom, do you know the story of Bloody Mary?

Me: Like the real Bloody Mary?

Ray: Yes, have you ever heard that story?

Me: Yes. Why? Did you learn about her in history today?

Ray: No, but what story do you know?

Me: Bloody Mary was the Queen of England and she was a Catholic. She didn't like the other church in England (the Protestants) and she had many of them killed. So they called her Bloody Mary.

Ray: No, mom. That's not what I heard. Bloody Mary is a ghost who came into the girls bathroom today and attacked Janie with a bloody eyeball. And mom there is a fourth grade teacher who is buried underneath the playground!

(So much for my little history lesson!)

Funny kids

Ray has been sick the last few days which has meant a lot of lying on the couch watching cartoons. I guess yesterday he was starting to lose it because I heard him talking to the TV. This is what I heard:

(Ray was watching Go Diego Go)

Diego: We need your help!!

Ray: No you don't.

Diego: Count the turtles.

Ray: No.

Diego: You did it!

Ray: No I didn't.

Diego: Now help me find the eggs.

Ray: Never.

Diego: Great! You are a good helper.

Ray: No I'm not.

He did that through the entire episode. It was so funny!!

-------------------------------------------------------------

And the other day while shopping at Harmons...

Me: Wow..these shopping carts are big and black and shiny!

Ruby: Yeah mom they are black and shiny like me!!

Alma the younger was a Cougar??

Last night during scriptures we read about Alma the younger and the angel and what he learned in his "coma."

Shannan: What do you think was the first thing Alma said when he woke up?

Ray: BYU Rocks!!!

Ruby's emergency plan

Tonight I reviewed with my kids what to do if I passed out or was hurt and they needed to get help. Ray obviously knows how to call 911 so he was easy. Ruby on the other hand is not quite ready to learn 911 (she's totally smart and could learn it...that's the problem...she's the kind of kid who would call 911 if I was like in the next room and she couldn't find me.)

So I taught Ruby that if I was hurt she should run next door and tell them I needed help. When we practiced Ray was the neighbor. I fell the floor dramatically "passing out". Ruby ran over to me shook my shoulder a few times, then ran next door (my bedroom) and when Ray opened the door Ruby said, "Someone is dead."

We all laughed so hard! It was really funny but I'm sure it would get our neighbors attention if there was a real emergency!!!

The Nutcracker 2009 Part II

I took Ray and his cousin to see the Nutcracker on Saturday. This was my second time this year and it was of course beautiful and magical. Ray and his cousin loved it and only got restless during the Grand pas de deux. The Mouse King, Snow Queen, and the Grand pas de deux were especially great this time.

In other news, here is what I heard my two year old Solomon say to little Ammon who was playing with a toy motorcycle.

Solomon: No no Ammon. Give it to me. It's special.

No one else will think this is funny. But it was.

Some great and not so great Conversations

Ray: Mom see those clouds with the sun shining behind them?

Me: Yes.

Ray: It's so bright it looks like God is standing behind them.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me: Goodnight Ruby.

Ruby: Mom, please come in my room and give me hugs so tight?

Me: Of course. (smiling)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Me: Solomon, are you poopy?

Solomon: No.

Me: Can I check?

Solomon: Yah.

Me: Solomon you are poopy.

Solomon: Sorry.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ammon: AAAAAHHHHH!!!!

Me: Ammon, No. Say, "More." (using the sign language for "more")

Ammon: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!

Me: No. Say, "More."

Ammon: AAAAAAARRRRAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!

(All meal long, three times a day. It's no wonder why I had no patience this week. My nerves are fried.)

Bedtime Conversation

Ray: Mom, did Joseph Smith have a crotch?
Me: Um....What?
Ray: Did Joseph Smith have a crotch when they did the leg surgery?
Me: Do you mean a crutch?
Ray: Yeah. Did he have a crutch when they did the leg surgery?
Me: (relieved) Yes. Joseph Smith used a crutch.

Car conversations

Me (just joking): Hey maybe we should adopt another girl from Africa so Ruby can have a sister!!

Ray: No, we have too many babies already. (Pause) Can we adopt more parents?

---------------

Ruby: Mom, me not here.

Me: You're not here? Okay. Where are you?

Ruby: Mom, me not here.

Me: Okay. Where's Ruby? I wonder where she is.

Ruby: Mommy, me not here!!!

Ray: Mom, she can't hear the music can you please turn it louder?

---------------

Me: Did you find your cat Semisi (my nephew)?

Semisi: Yes.

Me: Where was she?

Semisi: Under the hot dog cooker.

Me: You mean the BBQ?

Semisi: (Pause)......Yes.

--------------

Me: Solomon get back in your car seat right now!!!! We are on the free way!!! How did he get out you guys??? Solomon get back in your seat RIGHT NOW!!!

Solomon: No.

Tonight's conversation

Shannan: The Nephi that prophesied of Christ's birth was named after the Nephi that had the Liahona. Ray, do you know who you are named after?

Ray: Yes.

Shannan: Who?

Ray: Grandpa Veloy.